Fat Farm

It sounded like water spewing out of a leak in a pipe. All too familiar. But there isn't any water coming to the garden house. Or is there?

Back on the ranch and going through a bit of a heatwave, I've been busy fixing and adjusting our irrigation systems. On one trip to the garden house to pick up more drippers, I noticed the distinct hiss of water spewing out. I didn't know of any buried pipes there, but you have to investigate these things, so I pulled away the board covering up the gap between the ground and the raised garden house and that's when I see it.

The torso of the biggest wound up snake I had ever seen on the ranch.

It was giant. Like a boa constrictor. The size of a baby's head.

I inadvertently let out a small squeal and excitedly run off to tell Big Dog who said, "That's a rattler."
"It's no rattlesnake! It's too big. And it wasn't rattling, it was hissing at me."
Of course, I wanted him to see it too so I dragged him out to the shed.
"Where? I can't see anything."
"Look, there. See the giant torso?"
This time, I could see more than just the torso, though. This time, there was the raised head, alert and focused on us. And the head was...yes, a rattlesnake head!
"Oh, god, you're right! It is a rattlesnake!"
And it was pissed off.

We scrammed and by the time I had to go back to the garden house, Snake had split, but I can't stop thinking about it.

Do rattlesnakes get that big? How many rodents did it have to eat to get so super-sized? I know our squirrels are giant, so it really shouldn't come as a surprise to see obese snakes. Or had it just eaten one and was I just seeing the belly bulge?