Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Isn't it strange?

In my former life, I'd gotten completely used to being evaluated by others. Praised, criticized, whatever. "You've got such a good voice." "That show was fun/stupid/incredibly embarrassing." "You suck." Comments from the people I worked with or for, and in the world of tv and radio, comments from total strangers, too. Being a workaholic was definitely linked to getting words of appreciation. In fact, in my case, I think that was the driving force.
"We couldn't have done it without you."
"You really made this work."
I give them a goofy smile and pant like a dog (inside) waiting for more pats on the head.

But now, no matter what I do, there's really no one around me to offer any kind of comment and I realize how sometimes it makes me Very Insecure. I guess that's why I've grown to love tending living things. If you do a good job, it shows: the trees are happy and bear nice fruit; the aphids have split and the roses look awesome. It's even better than somebody's opinion because you know, without a doubt, it's true. Nature never lies.

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